This final post from our Taiwan trip is all about me… Because this happened:
The Why
For weeks, people asked the question. I really didn’t have a great answer aside from it felt like time. The long hair made life difficult in many ways, but I did treasure it dearly. While I had usually attributed the 4.5-year growth to the pandemic, the younger me actually had deep admiration for the long hair on fictional characters from Blanka to Zero to 聶風 Nie Feng. With how long it took for my hair to grow out, it really was a once-per-lifetime opportunity. That is, once I chop off that ponytail, I’ll likely never have another excuse to grow it out again.
Over the years, Hong went from fully embracing my long hair to being somewhat on the fence. Her feelings echoed my own attitude, so when she suggested that I consider a haircut, I did.
The kids, on the other hand, had been consistent long hair loyalists. Even after Ting’s hair got cut short, she wanted me to maintain my long hair. Xuan was especially passionate about it, and got rather upset when we brought up the topic of a haircut.
With all that in mind, if I were ever to part with that ponytail, Taiwan would be a pretty darn good place and time to get it done. The island has a high concentration of stylists who work with Asian hair, after all, and the haircut could be a gift of sorts to Ba and Ma, who were never fans of my post-pandemic look. Hong joked about “leaving home one day without saying a thing, getting the hair cut, and seeing if your mom would notice,” and we had been operating with the assumption that it’s how I’d do it.
The Decision
We flew to Taiwan with the mindset that I might get a haircut, without a solid commitment or execution plan. If we didn’t end up with an open afternoon to roam around, I might have come home with that ponytail. It was kind of a coin toss.
The Hanfu photo shoot turned out to be a major turning point. I absolutely loved how I looked, which was made possible in part because I had long enough hair. However, without the stylist and her magical touch, I wasn’t gonna ever return to that look again. Having theoretically documented my best possible look helped me attain the peace of mind to say goodbye to that ponytail. I figured that if I didn’t take advantage of this opportunity, it’ll be tricky to find another “right” time for this haircut.
How It Went Down
On Friday afternoon, Ma went for her volunteer work, Ba took a nap, and the kids wanted to stay in the hotel to play mobile games nap in the AC. Hong and I headed out for a walk toward 師大 (National Taiwan Normal University). This neighborhood was known for having a night market and a lot of trendy stores. Being a college campus, I also hypothesized that there’d be plenty of haircut places for young people.
After grabbing a cup of what turned out to be the most expensive coffee that we got in Taiwan, we spotted a hair salon in an alley. It was the first of over a dozen haircut places that we’d come across in the vicinity, but we knew it was the one. Fate brought us there so, without question or checking prices, we walked in.
I asked the lady if they did men’s hair. She looked confused seeing my head of messy ponytail. I explained that I wanted it chopped off, help preserving it, and suggestion on a new style. Presumably it wasn’t every day that customers made this sort of request. She agreed to help, and pointed at a magazine for us to choose a new style from. After flipping through the entire book, we decided that a Japanese halfie on page 23 would define how I look going forward.
From there… the haircut happened.
First haircut in 4.5 years and it was a lot of weight off my head. It took a while and I appreciate Hong staying with me to document the process and provide me with emotional support.
The Aftermath
The kids were not pleased to see the new me, but having been prepared for some time, they were also not overly upset with me losing all that hair.
Ba and Ma saw us at separate times that evening and each had a genuine surprised reaction. They were both very happy to see me ditch that long hair, though.
The following weeks saw a series of surprised faces from neighbors, coworkers, and clients, many of whom had never previously seen me with short hair. There were some really neat moments of people going from entirely not registering to realizing but with a “what the hell happened to you” question mark on their faces. And it wasn’t just them – even when I looked in the mirror, I would be startled by that rather unfamiliar look.
It’s been three weeks since that haircut and, at times, I still catch myself in the old habits. Sometimes when I sit back in a chair, I instinctively reach out to push aside my ponytail. Last night as I got into bed, I reached behind to pull off that hair tie. Time will tell how long these reflexes persist.
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